That was the first time I asked permission to the superior for the inconvenience that I might be able to bring on sleeping over. I did it with purpose. One cause I know that I’m going to stay for 2 nights sharing for their funds, two cause I know that being there might change their routine for a while. Respect is along with the approval. And upon allowing being there, I know that it will be of great help for my part. And I was thankful. I know that was something different and good, cause for the first time I directed my request to the elder.
But I was shocked to know what really happened. Because at her age I am asking for a little maturity beyond any circumstances. Maybe I expected much. Didn’t I? It was fun to know the truth, but it was also offending to be aware of the details.
Now it feels like being there is more of a burden. Is 2 nights too much? And thinking time and again makes my body to demand for a foul! Though I wasn't really the issue, my existence made the matter to arise. And that what makes it unpleasant.
Giving the comfort place of the house owner to the visitor is nothing really for a host. It’s a house rule for those who are hospitable. But there, it’s like so unjust! Saying that she is the one entitled is also like saying “shame on you aby! That’s my area!”. I thought everything was fine, but my presence just brought distress to the titleholder. If that’s the case I was better left not to be permitted, it would be fine sometimes to make an alibi.
It’s not only the relatives that can feel the embarrassment on what the subject is about, but also the visitor who felt that she was an obligation that’s holding each others security. And going back there is shameless.
I’m neither mad nor bothered, but I’m offended and disappointed.
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