Ok. So here I am telling why.

A lot of friends unceasingly asking me why not try to commit myself in a serious relationship. I know I often answered them that I am still not ready for any kind. But to be honest I just don’t see any man who’s worthy for the time.

I may not believe on having a prince charming, nor love at first sight, even in destiny. I don’t believe in signs, I don’t believe in soul mates.  But I am not an antagonist of love. I just know how to be cautious.

I know I am wicked. I am sensitive. I am dominant. I don’t try to look so soft for a guy to like me. I curse, I yell. I don’t try to look someone who is so fine to be like. Because I want a guy who will see how unfathomable I am yet understands me. I want a guy who takes time to listen to my dramas. I want a guy who will make me feel there’s nothing wrong being a weirdo.

Indeed I do like people at times. But at the end of the day I know I want someone who  doesn't just give time to express himself but also have time to ask how I am. Why am I like this? I want a guy who is interested for who I am and for who I am not. I am not looking for a perfect one, just one who will make me see things that I am blinded of.

I want to waste my time to a guy who complain and rectify and understand and accept and remain. Because the truth is, I illuminate to those people I know who appreciates me. 

Things to do before I die.

Ok. Since the pad that I bought for these letters is missing, I’ll just transfer it all here first.

This is not the complete roll, I know, somewhere, somehow my list might swell because of the stuffs that I will be wanting. But for now let me share some of them here.

Scribbled down randomly:

1. See Korea’s autumn.
2. Try a gondola ride in Venice.
3. Run a marathon.
4. Visit Camsur’s finest beach.
5. Visit Ilocos Norte. (har! first target i think!)
6. Have a house with a library and a music room.
7. Buy a new electronic keyboard or a piano.
8. Enroll to a piano class. AGAIN.
9. Have Tom’s (the shoes!)
10. See a nebula in real life. :D
11. See a galaxy in real life. :D
12. Lie down on a smooth grass watching the clouds while the gust of wind embraces me. (I've done this when I was in 7, wanna experience the serenity again.)
13. Visit GSA on a Saturday afternoon during a summer.
14. Take pictures of nature from a good camera. :D
15. Watch sunset in peace.
16. Witness sunrise in peace.
17. Jog on a seashore.
18. Tell my story to a stranger.
19. To have a guy who will make beautiful girls jealous because of me.
20. Visit the Grand Canyon.
21. Have a shower on a waterfall.
22. Visit a big city.
23. Be proudly in love!
24. Get really drunk. 
25. Experience marine life up close.
26. Spend the whole day shopping and pampering myself. 
27. Learn to speak a foreign language. (aside from English)
28. Plant a tree.
29. Fall deeply in love -- helplessly.
30. Ask someone on a date.
31. Sleep under the stars.
32. Find a job I love.
33. Go up in a hot-air balloon.
34. Climb a mountain.
35. Give a heartfelt surprise to someone.
36. See snow.
37. Live through four seasons of the year.
38. See an eclipse.
39. Race via car.
40. Play via paintball.